Sunday, November 15, 2009

Holiday Survivor: Reflect and Project

As we look forward through November and December, many of us are daunted by demands of the season. We wonder whether we can balance the physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual dimensions of holiday observance without veering off center and toppling.

I would like to explore that challenge together in coming weeks, borrowing a title from the popular TV reality show, Survivor. Here we are, stranded on an idyllic island we variously call Thanksgiving, Hanukkah, Christmas, Kwanzaa, Black Friday, Eating Season, and the Winter Solstice. Although life on the island promises happiness, it often delivers less than we hope for.

I suggest that we enhance our holiday enjoyment by reflecting and projecting. Let’s reflect for a moment on our past experience, and project the lessons we have learned before onto the weeks ahead. (A few open moments, pen, and paper are helpful for this exercise.)

Quiet your mind, take 5 deep breaths, and ask yourself: “What are some of my favorite memories of holidays over the years? What happened, and what details do I remember most fondly?” List the holiday experiences, activities, and traditions that have meant the most to you.

Is religious observance a part of your list? What about decorating the house? Family gatherings? Baking? Do you love selecting perfect gifts for everyone on your list? Charitable giving or volunteer work? What about sending letters and cards? Do you live for parties, and enjoy entertaining? I suspect the complete list is a long one.

Now, take a harder look at the list and pare it down from “good” to “best.” If you could choose only three holiday traditions to feature this year, what would rise to the top? Why are they he most important for you? What underlying values do they represent? Is family most important? Inner peace and spiritual focus? Social connections? Physical health and energy?

Let’s position those three core holiday values at the center of your seasonal commitment. Name one action you will take next week for each core value. Perhaps you will engage daily in spiritual reading. Spend an afternoon writing the annual holiday letter. You might research options for family snow play. Run with a buddy. Put the actions on a calendar. Commit.

Many of your upcoming holiday events and activities will not fit within the top three values you have listed. That’s OK. However, if you have clearly identified your deepest values and highest priorities, those are more likely to come first when challenged by the rest. If they come first, you will emerge on the other end of December, satisfied that you not only survived the holiday season, but thrived. I look forward to celebrating success in the New Year.

Until the next time, go well.

Pam

2 comments:

Chuck said...

I really like this idea, Pam. Myra and I have been thinking of volunteering someplace for Thanksgiving; this values-based approach might be a good tool for helping us decide where to do that. Or even to increase the odds that we will actually follow through!

Anonymous said...

Except for attending Christmas concerts or planning and attending Christmas services, they all seem like a lot of work. My favorite memory is relaxing at home after all the extra chores are done.

This is a great thing to think about, though.

Anonymous #2