How Full is your Glass?

Last week, in recovering from an irritating cold, I shared some lessons I learned about hope, help, and healing. This week, I have continued to read Martin Seligman’s Learned Optimism, and find more of interest there to pass along.

Be patient, though. I have not yet reached the chapter on how we can turn it around if our patterns run to the dark side. I was tempted to skip ahead to find the “answers” in the back of the book before writing again. Then I decided we would take the journey in sequence. As I read, I found it helpful to understand the habits of thought behind chronic discouragement on the one hand, and a more encouraging outlook on the other. What, indeed, is the difference between Eeyore and Pooh?

Pessimists see setbacks as permanent. If I fall at that end of the spectrum, I see today’s bout of back pain as one more sign of progressive decline. “What can I expect at my age? I guess I just can’t keep doing my own yard work like I always have.” An optimist, on the other hand, would view the pain as temporary. “Yes, I have these episodes a time or two a year. They remind me to visit the chiropractor and do some gentle yoga in the mornings.”

Setbacks also register with pessimists as pervasive and characteristic. “It sucks getting old. Today it’s my back, tomorrow something else. My whole body is falling apart.” Optimists see their problems as specific and exceptional. “My back has always been tricky, but by and large my body is holding up well. As long as I eat well and stay active, I can do anything I want to.”

Finally, optimists explain setbacks as arising from external circumstances, as someone else’s fault or bad luck. Pessimists track similar experiences to their own inherent flaws; they see themselves as programmed for failure or suffering.

Now that we know more about the poles of hope and despair, how do you see yourself on the spectrum? If a hopeless pessimist rates “ 1” and the undaunted optimist is a “10, where are you”? If would like to dig deeper, see www.authentichappiness.org for a free assessment (scroll down the list of questionnaires on the Home page to the Optimism Test).

Next week, I promise to talk about “Changing from Pessimism to Optimism,” Part 3 of Seligman’s book.

Until the next time, go well

Pam
www.wellbuddies.com